Just Don't Forget Me

   Everyone has a common fear on being forgotten, Left behind, Token for granted etc.  I looked at myself in the mirror today and asked myself why I put up with the shit I do.  I said because if I don't they will just leave.  But why am I worried about them? why am I constantly arguing and fighting with who wouldn't blink twice if I was alive or dead?  These people are not in my circle they aren't helping me, and they sure as hell ain't making anything any better.  I was hurt I was confused all I wanted was for someone to love me for ME.  If I didn't have enough money, if I didn't come with a gurantee, Half the time if I don't have weed, No one wants to see me.  So what's the point?  why am I trying constantly to be approved by someone who wouldn't even be approved by me.
   So I asked myself again So why do you put up with it?  Because I don't want to end up alone. I don't want to be that girl in the room taking every single shot and blunt I make, just to ignore the fact that I'm all alone.  So why try and make someone happy who will eventually leave me, No amount of money or gifts can make ANYONE stay, so what am I really spending and wasting time and ENERGY on?  For someone who claims "They loyal to me" for someone who claims "They my ride or die."?  Where were they when I got Jumped by 3 n*ggas? They wasn't there not even my family rode out for me.  Or that time I went to the hospital for a week?  Where were they when I needed a shoulder to cry on because the only man to ever make me feel that he really loved ME, had just passed away... N*ggas didn't come through for me.  N*ggas didn't call my phone and say I'm coming through just wait for me. I had to have CIGARETTES, MONEY, or WEED. 
   What type of homies are that?  So I really sat back and took a good look at myself and I said you know your TOO beautiful, your TOO strong, Your amazing.  You deserve so much better then that you know that.. I looked away from myself for a second and softly and said I know.  When I looked back at myself and said.  When your ready for real LOVE, come find me until then Just Don't Forget Me.

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